new me bye bye old me...

I had learnt to let go.

In 2011...I had my share of letting go some bad people who had hurt me even though they are dear to me...In 2011 I’d learnt to accept that sometimes it is best to just let go and cherish those who appreciates us in return. 

And...

 Sometimes, even if letting go is a hard thing to do, we just need to put a stop to the torments and gruesome plus heart wrenching experiences that they have put us through. Like the part when I decided to stop being friend with this ‘M’ girl…I would swear it on my own grave that she makes me believes we are like some kind of a besh buddy...but when she literally tricked me into going to worked and lived with the most monstrous + mean + SUPER superstitious mother of hers…I letting go of the nauseatingly consuming friendship…Well, it’s worth it.

I even blocked and stopped talking altogether with this annoying ‘F’ gal… I never feel so much hatred since I’ve been friends with her… to think that before they were all called themselves my besh galfrens…but all they ever did was... take everything of mine (my trust, my hope, my money!) but never gives anything in return…

But  I always wonder that if...

  but   

just like my family...

so

So...Happy New Year people!

ouhhh...

escapade

Britneying wit Irina

Sometimes I run 

Sometimes I hide 

Sometimes I'm scared of yo

But all I really want is to hold you tight 

Treat you right, be with you day and night 

Baby all I need is time 

Like i care...

plato me

Let it all go.

I can't sleep with all the turmoils inside.
I questions a lot of other things...but answer there came none.
A pleasant talks, a pleasant walks would be a sheer delight. But even that can't undo what has become heart of mine. i turn to my left...i turn to my right...and there still no one around..
I drifted.
i found myself tangled with the blanket..it's already 0930 a.m. I need to get up to start my day. And forget what hurts me inside. I'm glad i have Irina. not this onemeanbitch that i practically had lived wit for 3 month. not somebackstabberbitch that talks behind EVERYONE's back..(i pity her friends that she still get along with. Thousands of lies must she created and they still can't see what a hypocrite she is) .  These two, I no longer allowed linger in my life for they would have poisons me.

Things that i need to get done with within these two weeks.

-Russian homework.
-Russian Oral Test on 22 dec.
- Short story of Alice in WOnderland for Language in Literature and its Section B.
-a 25 pages of Cerpen for Penglahiran Bakat Kreatif.
-Test on Apai Alui and The Need To Be for Malaysian Literature.
-Text review for American Literature.
-Presentation on Emerson's Nature and Song of Myself by Whitman for American Lit.
-Presentation of Organizational Informations Theory in Theory Com (2nd assignment)
-Presentation for Mass Comm (2nd assignment)
-Mega Projek Baksis on 17 dec.
 -Mapura's proposal for KTP.

What else?
Pls there be no more. for I have only little will left in this sore bones.

someone out there...

and i'm going to find that someone.

reevaluate.

when i read his message....my throat starts to constrict. a drop of tear touch my right palm. Well, i guess people will not change will they..no matter how hard they had we convinced. yep they do change...but one trait that they still have on them that hurts me the most stays. He cares bout what others may have think bout him more than he cares bout what i thinks of him. My friend said.."well you are his GF , are you not?' of course you ENTITLED to do that..if he didnt thinks so...then he didnt think much bout you as a special person in his life. well thats not true...he cares bout me..but somehow...im just hurt..very hurt.. and i feel guilty bout posting this afraid he wiil think i am being dramatic over some petty stuff..erm..but what the hell...its my blog...and at least i am entitled to writes anything i want on it...although im no one in my so called BF life. how can he is ok when his friends cursed him on his wall post but he is not ok when i teased him with a questions that demand? Fine I will not do that again...in fact to make everyone's life easy i will 'try' not to do that again.  Besides..i dont think i can do that twice after what happened. its make me think twice tho..about everything. i just have to reevaluate the whole situations again..

Disturbia

Tanya's Labyrinth

best friend?

revelation.

FUCK YOU la!!!!

you make me hurl okeyh...so called besh girlfriend are you ?! eyh?

What makes you think you are more important than my Fikree?

.........

err...guys...the words up there *an arrow points upward* happened when i had realised how unworthy she was...

recaprecaprecap people!

Well...i was with my baby...Then we started to reminisce about d old days...bla3x...

Cut things short...eventually we WILL automatically talks nonsense about this one girl...who WAS one of my close friends...

Naive me, i guess...because i had always thought she cares about me. But after my Fikree clarified something to me...and the mist of innocences that clouded my already hazy brain evaporated...she's a dead meat alright... hypocrite.incorrigible.pig. NO more Miss Goody Two Shoes!

I should have flaunt back bitchy remarks when she’s talking rudely to Fikree that day…Why did I not do that…gallant me for sure coz thinking she is one of my girlfriends that I must gives priority to.

Sadly, I should have known that Fikree is such a sweetie…he wouldn’t have wanted me fighting with the girls becoz of him…And I get this huge revelations that…fuckin shit..Fikree IS my Beshfriend+Boyfriend!  I should have realised that sooner. Thanks sweetie.

Gendut!

oldie...!